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Boundaries: Solutions for Life Articles
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Boundaries Book Chapters
#1 The Push Me Pull You Dance
There are three main damaging relationship dances. Once you know them, your boundaries in relationships will get clearer and your relationships will be cleaner and more supportive.
Does the fear of rejection or abandonment leave you off balance? Do you manipulate others with your dance of coming and going? Are you unconsciously sabotaging your relationships?
This is one of the top three damaging relationship dances. It is powerful and inviting. Once you know it ,you see how it is played out almost daily. Being able to side-step this dance will bring you mastery at work and intimacy at home.
Do you over-give, over-care, over-love? Do you feel guilty when you say "no"? Do you get blindsided or disturbed by others anger? Does the word co-dependent apply to you? Is the Victim role your position in life? These are all boundaries problems.
There are six boundary problem styles you use that damage your relationships at home and work, with family and friends. The first step to changing something, is realizing that you are doing it.
Do you smother or take on others feelings and desires? You often feel wounded and victimized- you can't say "no"? Your way is the only way and your inflexible style alienates others? You await cues so you know "how" you are supposed to act? You leave a trail of angry people as you walk through life stepping on toes? You are unable to connect with others- even your friends don't know you have a heart? These are all signs of specific boundaries problems.
There are six boundary solution styles you can use to improve your relationships and communication in all walks of life: at home and work, with family and friends.
Learning the solution styles will help you to accomplish the goals you have in your life. Do you want to be taken seriously, yet still remain loving and gentle? Are your goals unattainable because you over use certain solutions styles without realizing it? Do you want your parenting to reflect your integrity and morals? Using the appropriate Boundaries solutions style will make your goals easily available to you, and you'll do what is right for you!
Bonding Through Bitching Do you gossip and complain? Maybe you are trying to get connection with others. Learn what 's really going on. And discover boundary solutions to use when others try to engage you in negative conversations. Click here for complete article
How To Retrain Your Partner & Friends When you first meet someone, you teach them how to treat you. By your words and actions you create an unwritten contract about your relationship. So what happens when start cleaning up your act and you are no longer needy or clingy or blaming? Yikees! Learn what to look out for and what to do as you integrate your new boundaries styles. Click here for complete article
Miss Manners Missed The Boat I was reading a relationship column written by Miss Manners and started groaning, "no, no, no!" The advice she was giving, was setting up the letter-writer for perpetual victimhood. It was bad. So here is a Boundaries Solutions for Life answer on how to do have great relationships. Click here for complete article
The Boundaries Sandwich You want to deliver your boundaries in a way that others will listen. Do you just cram it down their throats? No way! Learn the art of using The Boundaries Sandwich. With this relationship tool you can keep connections and set limits at the same time Click here for complete article
I'll Never Forgive Him Everyone should forgive those who hurt them, right? Well, maybe not. Or at least not until you have followed these easy steps, steps that most people forget to do when trying to forgive. Including why it's important to be selfish. Click here for complete article
